Recognizing the Signs
One morning, I woke up feeling like a shadow of myself. The spark that once lit up my days had dimmed, leaving me feeling like just another face in the crowd. Then, a memory popped up on my Facebook page about signs of depression. To my surprise, every item on the list resonated with me. Was I really going through depression? I didn’t feel sad. I thought I was being optimistic. After all, hadn’t I been cured? Over the next day, I scrutinized every thought and feeling. Yes, I was in an episode of depression.
Understanding My Behavior
Depression doesn’t always look like sadness or isolation. For me, it was the subtle yet destructive habit of pushing people away with curt responses and irritability. I found myself snapping at loved ones and feeling annoyed by the smallest things. I was present, smiling, but not truly listening. Other behaviors that undermined my self-esteem included:
- Unhealthy eating habits: Consuming foods that made me feel worse.
- Disconnecting from friends and family: Making excuses about being too busy or having nothing to say.
- Neglecting activities that are important to me: Writing, organizing, and basic self-care routines.
Reconnecting with My Values
Thinking you have it all figured out doesn’t mean you do. You still need to return to the basics, to the foundational practices that got you where you are. Personally, I need to reassess my values and principles and align my actions with them. They may evolve over time, as life changes. The key is knowing what’s most important to me and living in a way that supports those priorities. Otherwise, I drift away from what matters most, leading me away from my best self until I no longer recognize or love myself when I act against my values and principles.
Focusing on What Matters
I know I can succeed in my relationships with others. I have much to share. I am better than the person I’ve felt and believed myself to be over the past month. It’s time to reconnect with the relationships that matter most to me—my spouse, my family, my friends. These are the things that bring me happiness, not money, possessions, or my status in the workplace.
“Have you ever felt this way? What steps did you take to reconnect with your true self? Share your journey in the comments below.”
B2tRUE 